Hello, friends! I wanted to write something today that has been on my mind for a while. Lindsay wrote something similar the other week, and it was the push I needed to put my thoughts into a blog post.
Everyone is so busy these days, and like Lindsay pointed out, it’s almost a competition to see who is the busiest. Honestly, I feel like it has been this way since I was in college, when we were all “so busy” with classwork and other activities, that every time you talked to someone, it was like we were all trying to one up each other with how much work we had to do. (Oh, if only I realized how easy I had it in college!) However, in college, I could text or call a friend to meet me at happy hour that evening; now, I find myself scheduling brunch dates a month in advance just to see friends who live in the same town.
I am not trying to complain–we all have work, family, and personal commitments that only seem to increase as we get older. I am absolutely grateful to have so many positive things in my life right now, but at the same time, this”busy-ness” has me stressed to the max lately.
You see, I feel all this pressure to “do it all.” I’ll see social media posts about some woman or another who “works a full time job, has three kids, a side hustle, AND sells vegan cupcakes at the Farmer’s Market on the weekends! OMG she’s AMAZING!” I then feel like I am not working hard enough to be doing–whatever I need to be doing! I honestly don’t even know, but I see women with all these jobs and side hustles and I feel like I need to be doing more.
Then, of course, there’s the whole blogging world–I always feel like I’m getting inundated with bloggers who can tell me exactly what I need to do to make money blogging! I’ll be making six figures in no time! I thought this could be me–I thought all I needed to do was work really hard, never have any time for myself, and soon I would be making money to support our family entirely on my salary alone!
I’ve realized lately that this may not be my dream. I really had to take a step back and re-evaluate. I spent way too much money on these “make money blogging” courses, but I never seemed to find time in my day to commit to watching the videos or filling out the worksheets. Of course, this made me all the more stressed, anxious, and irritable. Then, I would start the vicious “comparison game,” and compare myself to all these other women who manage to find time to blog and be successful. (I would also like to point out this article about one person going into serious debt trying to be an influencer, which Kati shared recently in this blog post. Luckily, I haven’t gone into debt, but at this point there are better ways for me to spend my money.)
Honestly, my dream is to be a writer and publish a novel, and that dream was being seriously neglected in my quest to be the next great blogger. I started this blog because I loved writing: I loved writing about my life and other random things, and I wanted it to be a place where my funny and witty personality could shine. (Well, I think that I’m funny and witty, at least.) Instead I felt like I was turning it into one formula post after another, trying to get perfect pictures and perfect titles so I could get noticed.
So, the whole point of this post is to say that I am slowing down, and it is okay for you to slow down too, if that is what you need. (Another great read is this post from Chelsea, that you are enough–makes me cry every time!) I will still blog, of course, because I do enjoy cultivating my little corner of the internet! However, it may not be super regularly, as I’ve got some other things to focus on–my family, our upcoming move, and working on my novel.
I also want to point out that there is nothing wrong with women who are doing all these amazing, incredible things! They should keep on keepin’ on. The responsibility is on me to stop comparing myself so much to everyone else, and to realize that I am taking my own pace with life, with my own goals, and that is perfectly acceptable.
Thank you, dear readers, for taking the time to read and comment. I want to strive more for honesty on this blog, so this post is hopefully the start of something new.